Saturday, April 26, 2008

3 Reasons Why I Have Recently Become a Chump


Reason #1--

I got a new haircut.

Explanation:
For years, I have had pretty much the most low maintenance hair-do available to women. I have worn it "pixie style" which means it is so short, there really is nothing you CAN do with it. Jump out of the shower, slather some pomade in it, and it's done and dry in minutes. If I let it grow a little long, I may have steeped to putting a bobby pin in it. If I let it grow a lot long, I was forced to put two pony tails in it to look presentable, a look I was forced to don for 2 solid months as I grew it out for my new haircut. Now---- I've had to dig out my hairdryer (yes, I do have one used only to blow up the air mattress and for company's use once or twice in the past 6 years or more). I also had to buy a CERAMIC HAIR STRAIGHTENER, a round brush, and clippys. I have seen these things used before and thought they looked complicated, but now I find myself needing to use them. I am telling you, it's not easy and I really, actually suck at using all these foreign objects.
So now I have to reserve some time to do my hair (like a chump) and "getting ready" means a whole lot more. More time, more cords all over my bathroom, more products, more chances for Scout to burn her curious fingers on the alligator chomper looking thing, and more clippys.

Reason #2--

No more DVR in my life

Explanation:
We moved out of our house and are living with my father in law until we find a new house. We subscribe to Dish and have a DVR (digital video recorder). We called them and put our account on hold until we move into our new house. Here, my father in law has Direct TV (Rob and I could write a whole other blog about the pros of Dish and the many cons of Direct TV, but I will spare you all). He is a "no frills" type of person and doesn't have any sort of DVR. Let me explain to all of you that have never had a DVR before (those that have, know exactly what my problem is): -I am going to interrupt here and say for the record that is not a frowny face, it's actual punctuation- ok, I stopped watching any tv in real time (the news now and then, but rarely, Rob and I would actually record the news and watch it a little delayed, shhh). If I happen to want to watch tv while a show I wanted to watch was on, I would more often then not, record it and watch some other show I had recorded previously -at least until the show had been on for 15 minutes or so, so I had a commercial buffer, very much like we watch the news. I know, I'm out of control- I (or some old man more like, could probably go off on a social commentary about "our now! generation" and so forth, but hey-I am what I am, and I like it and make no excuses!)

Now, if I want to watch tv (we only have one receiver here, so between living with 2 men who like basketball A LOT and a 2 year old that likes Noggin, believe me, watching tv is a rare event for me these days) I have to actually watch it when it comes on (and be home), and watch commercials (like a chump). I tip my hat to anyone that does watch tv and has no DVR and also has a 2 year old. I forgot how much they interrupt you while you are watching tv, that fact is easy to overlook when you have a pause and a rewind button at the ready. I also must tip my hat here to anyone who has no DVR and watches American Idol or Deal or No Deal. If a show isn't online, I most likely am not watching it at all, as I can pause, etc. on the laptop which brings us to...

Reason #3--

We are having a problem with our laptop.

Explanation:
Oh sigh, our laptop. For about 8 months now, the battery has been crap. It doesn't hold more then 10 minutes of juice. Rob has it under warranty at CompUSA, he took it in and they had it for a few weeks, then called him and told him they were going out of business and he better pick up the unfixed laptop before they close. So, ok, no problem, while we use it we just have to keep it plugged in. Well, a few months ago, the cord got a short in it and if anyone touches it, you would have to shake it and manipulate it until the little battery light goes off. Annoying, but, again, no problem, this just became a part of our everyday life and was accepted. Last week--PROBLEM. We could shake it and shake it and battery light just stayed on. Rob stripped the cord and fused it together and wrapped electrical tape around it. There was a beautiful moment where it worked and 10 minutes later.... hated battery light. Fused cord works no more. Perhaps we should be thankful our house didn't burn down from Rob's do it yourself electrical work, but it is hard to have perspective when your beloved laptop is sitting in the corner of the bedroom useless.
Here's the chump part. Once upon a time I could lie in my dungalees* in my bed and surf the internet or watch movies or online tv shows with my ipod noises**. Now, I am sitting in the living room, cold, my back hurts and so does my bum because of this hard chair. Believe you me, that is exactly where I would be right now while writing this blog. Notice the times of all my blogs are mainly late at night. After 9:00 is precious Emily time, Scout is asleep and then Rob is asleep and I am free to do what ever I want. I take full advantage of this time and am more often then not up until 1 or 2. At these hours, yes I am up, but that doesn't mean I want to be "up". Rob is a lightweight and likes his sleep. I am a night owl. We mesh well in this way because once he is asleep, he is out. I can be right next to him and type on the laptop, read with the lights blazing, laugh right out loud, etc. all in the comfort of my own bed next to My Favorite.

See!!! Total chump. What's next I ask you??

Scout Dictionary

*Dungalees: See Pajamas. This is Scout's word for jammies and it is just the best word Rob and I have ever heard and from the first time it came out of her mouth, became the only word any of us use when we refer to our night clothes.

**Noises: See earphones. That is just what Scout calls earphones. It is always delightful to witness what her little brain comes up with and how it works. It is related to her word for flashlights: darks.

3 comments:

bspeck said...

you need to put a picture of your new haircut so those of us that don't live out there can see it!

megandjon said...

i'm also intrigued to see the new 'do. i've never seen you with anything but the pixie cut!

and jon and i loved the scout words!

oh, and to answer your question, we got a bosch.

eliza said...

You're funny. (In a good way). And I agree, I want to see the haircut.

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